Gratitude-AngerWould you like to express your gratitude and handle your anger at home? Of course, you may really love the people you live with, but they can still make you angry from time to time. To keep you and your relationships healthy, it’s important to find a way to handle your anger and lower your stress level.

You may know that you want to express your joy, love, and gratitude for your family, so what can you do when you feel angry? Instead of focusing on ways to address any specific situation, it’s more effective to look for ways that work to handle anger at home in general.

Follow these 5 tips to diffuse anger, invite peace and harmony into your home, and spread gratitude instead:

1.    Exercise. One way to work off stress and anxiety in your home situation is to get moving. You can join a gym, work out in your bedroom or garage, or just take a walk. It’s a great way to get your endorphins going and feel happier.

•    Ironically, with exercise, you can make yourself feel better even if the circumstances that caused the anger don’t change. Simply the act of getting your blood pumping and elevating your heart can get your endorphins flowing.

•    You can also try exercising together with your family. One of the benefits of exercising together is that you’ll all feel calmer afterward. When you’re all de-stressed together, you can help one another through issues that might have otherwise made you angry.

•    If you are lifting weights and doing reps of 10-12, think a gratitude filled thought in between reps!

2.    Listen to music. Personally, I enjoy listening to music all the time! Try doing something mentally soothing to keep stress at bay. Music is one of the best ways to relax and de-stress, and it’s popular with people of all ages, income levels, and other factors. Pick the music you like; it’s usually more effective, though, when you choose something quiet. Listen to music that makes you feel rested and calm.

•    Try several different musical styles – you’ll know when you’re listening to something that works for you. And once you’ve located it, you can listen whenever you need to for a calming break.

•    When listening to music and trying for diversity, try listening to a different radio station. This is perfect if you have satellite radio (XM or Sirius). Another option is to listen to an online radio station (using iTunes you can find all sorts of music). One last suggestion, try Pandora.

3.    Read. Reading is also a good way to de-stress. Choose a lighthearted book that’s comical, romantic, or otherwise makes you feel good. You can also read a religious or spiritual book if you’re so inclined. Any book that gives a good, positive, and gratitude filled message about the world or the people in it can help you feel better and be more relaxed.

4.    Be thankful. When you’re feeling stressed, try counting your blessings. Write them down, if it helps you. Sure, there might be some aggravating things going on in your home – but there are also many things you can be thankful about. Think about what’s good in your life, rather than what you don’t like.

•    You can always come back here to All About Gratitude for some positive and uplifting material.
•    When you focus on gratitude, you’ll also see more of the good in your life.
•    When you think negatively, it’s easier to feel angry and stressed. These emotions can make it harder to relate to the people in your family. Positive thinking, on the other hand, helps diffuse your anger and brings you more good things to feel good about!

5.    Breathe. When you feel angry, take a moment to take a few slow, deep breaths. This action has multiple benefits. When you breathe deeply, it sends extra oxygen to your brain for clarity of thought and relaxes your muscles. It also gives you a moment to take a mental step back and look at the bigger picture.

•    When you give yourself time to think first, you’re much less likely to lash out, either verbally or physically. You can then approach the issue feeling calmer.

The people who love you can make it difficult for you sometimes, even if they don’t mean to. If you use the tools suggested here to help you stay positive, you can get a handle on your anger and enjoy greater happiness in your home.

Be Well.
Paul.
The Gratitude Guru

6 Comments

  1. Carol Giambri on April 10, 2011 at 10:09 pm

    Enjoyed this post Paul. Anger is a big issue for many who don’t know how to vent properly, recognize they have this issue and get professional help if necessary. Thanks.

  2. Menka on April 10, 2011 at 10:11 pm

    Wow. Excellent. Yes, lotus can only blossom in dirty water. Another way of saying, if there is no dirty water we will never know about lotus. I believe we could find gratitude in tears as well because it makes our eyes cleaner and it calms us down if something makes us angry.

  3. Michele on April 10, 2011 at 10:26 pm

    Gratitude and anger don’t feel like they belong in the same sentence, but gratitude goes with everything. You are right. Taking time to think things through helps.
    As always, spot on.

  4. Rose Kirkland on April 11, 2011 at 11:24 am

    I love the suggestions you give to work through your anger. Anger is a very normal emotion and we all can get angry at times. However, it is important to do it in a responsible way.

    By this, I mean that we do NOT blame other people because they MADE us angry. That is coming from a place of victim. The truth is that nobody can make us angry IF we choose to not react to their anger or the situation. We are always in control and nobody can make us do anything. We do not have to react in anger…

    The way that we know that we need therapy or counseling is to watch our reactions… That is the ‘clue’ that we have a deep-rooted problem that stems down deep below the situation that made us angry. However, most people do not know this principle and I am on a mission to teach people how to heal themselves. Great post.

  5. Victoria Gazeley on April 11, 2011 at 10:34 pm

    For me it’s all about lack of exercise. Your tips are spot on and if we all remembered to do them when we get angry, what a different world it would be! Thanks, Paul.

  6. Donovan Grant on April 13, 2011 at 4:35 pm

    Nice post Paul and very close to my heart. I practice you five solutions to anger daily and I can confirm that they all add up to the ideal recipe for me to remain calm under pressure. As I write I am listening to a Vangelis track. Cheers

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